Joining you in the afterlife

Today I am broken but I allow myself to be. What I have feared for long but not accepted has caught me off guard, as it does.

Revisiting pain I buried long ago in the depths of my gut and soul.

Pictured it being easier than it seems, not ready to loose my last little piece of you, but in a way jealous that I don’t get to join the journey of rekindled family in the afterlife, so peaceful and quiet.

Our connections of souls are bounded by love and pain, for loss is what makes you feel the most but love is what makes you heal the most. I love you so, so very much, I miss you everyday, I wish I could be with you wherever you may lay.

Still don’t know this fortune I have of one foot in life, another in death I feel them both so much it pains.

My senses are heightened in all of these ways sometimes I have days where I wish I didn’t feel so much, I’m just a little bit tired of trying so hard to feel in touch.

With your breath, with your smell, with your laughter and sight, oh i so do wish I could follow you into the light.